Welcome to middle age.
Boy if that idea doesn’t irritate those of us who are used to thinking of ourselves as young. One moment we’re excited at our developing social and career lives, then we are thinking about retiring. Where did all of that time go?
As I move through this transition where people now address me as “sir” far more frequently than I am comfortable, I am finding that the fun is still here. Perhaps like my tragically un-hip clothing style may be fitting me in weird new ways, I am settling into this new lifestyle with a sense of humor and purpose that is intended to make it all work.
And Don’t Call Me Shirley
Working in higher education used to remind me of being young, though lately it is reminding me more that I am now older. Engaging in conversation with college students can sometimes do more to point out differences in the generations rather than emphasize shared likes.
As a movie fan, references to classic cinema tend to crop up in my conversation. Students don’t always understand the reference. A sign of the passing of time I suppose. However, the conversations can become teachable moments
Grasping the opportunity, I like to introduce younger people to some of the culture that took place before they were born. With their proclivity for technology, I ask them to Google the cultural reference. In a few key strokes, they often have video of the reference. Whether they will admit to the humor varies but they find out that even “older” people can be cool.
What I Want Middle Age to Be
When musing about the time that is getting away, I resolved recently that my goal is to age gracefully. Not a dramatic viewpoint for sure but one that I think fits.
Aging happens.
No amount of anti-aging remedies or wishful thinking will make my body age less. Slower perhaps but not less. I’m stuck with muscles that are not quite as strong as they once were. I have a nervous system that doesn’t fire quite as quickly. And there is a whole host of other things that my body just doesn’t do quite as well now as before.
So what.
Lifestyle is what makes getting older what it is. Barring any disease process, how I treat myself is what determines how I physically feel and perform. Simple things that I bang on about on this blog (nutrition, exercise, stress, rest) is what this quality of living comes down to. No potions or supplements. Just taking care of myself.
Funny thing is that as I focus on caring for this aging wreck of a body, how I perceive time and its fleeting nature starts to change. Worrying less about what is already gone and learning to truly appreciate what is still here brings some peace. Some sense of control.
I may not know how much time I still have but I “surely” want to find ways to enjoy the time without regrets.
So far so good.
For children, childhood is timeless. It is always the present. Everything is in the present tense. Of course, they have memories. Of course, time shifts a little for them and Christmas comes round in the end. But they don’t feel it. Today is what they feel, and when they say ‘When I grow up,’ there is always an edge of disbelief—how could they ever be other than what they are?
― Ian McEwan
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