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Making Gratitude in Our Holiday Season

Posted on November 26, 2020November 26, 2020 by Dr. Hal Edghill, D.C.
snow at night in the woods

The word Gratitude is bantered about almost as much as the word Sale at this time of year. There is something about the frequency and casual use of the word that certainly leaves one feeling slightly poorer for the experience. Words have become so weaponized by so many groups and individuals lately, often times to the point of being nonsensical, that it is harder to take comfort in familiar sounds. In the same way that one’s Healthcare has now become a personal responsibility, instead of a healthcare industry responsibility, making our own peace through language also belongs to us. So, let’s give this a try. I mean, how hard can it possibly be?

Learning Times

manstanding outdoors

We have all been through much this year. The details vary from one person to another but the story is the same. Loss has finally entered the personal vocabulary of most people, instead of just some. We still have a minority still trying to pretend away some Life circumstances but that group is smaller now. Most of us are learning to come to terms with what we have. Things we wish for is now a separate category of personal concern.

With wisdom comes perspective. Learning what things in Life we are willing to expend personal energies on and likely more importantly, the things that we are willing to let go of because the personal cost gets too high. This is where gratitude lives. To be thankful for the things that are, not the things that we have.

Making Gratitude

Gratitude is recognizing the parts of living that contribute positively to that living. It is an active process that though we tend to celebrate it seasonally, can be done all of the time so that it contributes to our appreciation of Life year-round.

stained glass image of an altar boy

I remember the first midnight mass that I was allowed to attend as a child. I was about 7 years old and Dad had been an Episcopal priest for all of about a year. We were in a tiny Wisconsin resort town called Eagle River, where snowfall was measured by how close it got to the eaves of the house each winter.

My normal bedtime was around 7:30, so the challenge of being an alert altar boy in church at 11:30 was of parental concern. There was the excitement of napping in the afternoon to prepare for the night, as well as the very real concerns of interrupting Santa’s appointed rounds that evening. I was nothing if not invested in this night.

As the nighttime hour approached, Dad and I headed out into the impenetrably dark and cold evening. There is a special quality of quiet in a Wisconsin winter. We walked bundled against the cold in the open, the only sounds being the foggy breaths we made and the squeaky crunch of snow underfoot. We wordlessly moved down the path through the snow that connected the vicarage to the church.  As we moved past the lone streetlamp, and as if on cue, snow began to noiselessly fall.

Being Home

The mixture of feelings and the awesomeness of the natural display taught me a great many things that night. I learned that the world is much larger (and magical, if I let my enthusiasm run) than I imagined and that the world was capable of much beauty, especially during seemingly inconsequential moments. Appreciating what is present, not what is expected.

I make my own gratitude out of the moments I know as real. It does not exist in the things around me but in the people and experiences that are part of me. So, in these unsettled times, connect with the important parts of Life and say thanks. There are plenty more where those came from.

Enjoy the little things, for one day you may look back and realize they were the big things.

-Robert Brault

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