I was wondering whether cultivating healthy screen relationships could be an interesting choice for a post. So much of our daily communications are with these apps and nothing seems to be broken. Everything in social media paradise is hunky dory.
At least, that is what our screen relationships tell us anyway.
Let’s go question some assumptions for a few minutes.
Taking A Short Vacation
The occasional mental health break from social media can be very helpful in our management of the emotions that social media are so good at conjuring. There are just times when I feel saturated by all the angst and hyperbole that I need a breather.
Going into last year’s election cycle, I fully anticipated, and was not disappointed by, the sheer volume of cheerleading and vitriol that only social media can deliver. Mudslinging that I casually observed in print and television media before, has now been replaced by a decidedly juvenile format.
The fact that such immaturity is publicly displayed by adults in public office and respected positions is very concerning. Assumptions I have always made about people in general have been coming under some critical review lately.
Anyway, after the rhetoric overload, I took periodic vacation from all of the emotion.
Better to take care of oneself when the community does not.
When I returned a few weeks later, however, the angst was still there. In fact, it seemed to be amplified.
Oh my.
Making Some Changes Permanent
Scrolling through my feeds became an exercise in frustration. Not every post needs to be a cute puppy or kitten, but geez people. Demanding the heads of political rivals on pikes on a day-in-day-out basis is bordering on pathology.
The social media consumer is placed in the position of either engaging the conversational violence head on or finding a less violent and hopefully constructive response.
If fighting, or providing counter arguments, results in dialogue, all the better. The problem with trolling is that dialogue is never the intended outcome. Instigating fights is strictly for the generation of emotions between combatants.
A zero sum game.
Prioritizing my own mental health is important, so I started making some tough decisions. Not least of which was that I started making some social media changes permanent. Instead of taking breaks from certain accounts, I reluctantly unfollowed the ones posting the most toxic shares.
Such deep cleaning of social media meant the loss of long-term friends’ accounts. This was tough to do. I value people and relationships highly.
Being an adult sometimes, however, calls us to do things we dislike.
The pandemic and politics have changed all of us. Some of us just feel the changes. Others seem wrapped up in group identities that demand the expression of a lot of anger. While I am disappointed with friends’ actions that distances them from others, I respect those decisions.
I miss you and please understand that after all the turmoil, we will have the opportunity to come together to heal.
When the time comes.
Healthy Screen Relationships With?
At the start of this post, what constituted healthy screen relationships was about my interactions with social media apps. The journey, however, has taken me to my friendships on those apps.
What I am finding is that the healthiest way to respond to the toxicity of violent rhetoric is not to engage it but to leave it. Two wrongs still do not make a right.
People change and we have to be willing to go in new directions if we are to grow. Unfortunately, this sometimes means leaving old relationships behind.
Taking care of our own wellbeing, whether it involves eating healthy or walking away from toxic relationships, we are called upon to take actions that protect ourselves. A tough job sometimes but one worth the effort.
“The lion cannot protect himself from traps, and the fox cannot defend himself from wolves. One must therefore be a fox to recognize traps, and a lion to frighten wolves.”― Niccolò Machiavelli
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